How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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