wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Randomize
