somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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