forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Randomize
