i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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