Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize