bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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