Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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