He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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