is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
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