There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Randomize
