what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
