Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
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