big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
