Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
