I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
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