my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Randomize
