so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
