i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize