this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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