oh god the rape fog is back!
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
where are you?
Hypothermia
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize
