Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
