i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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