that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Randomize
