Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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