i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
So apparently I’m into choking now
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