Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Randomize
