Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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