Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Randomize
