She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize