God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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