Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
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