guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
