I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
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