just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
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