Small penises have feelings too.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Randomize
