weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
