real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
