I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
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