You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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