So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
