my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
