hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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