so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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