Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
i just made my gag reflex go away.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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