she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize