I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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