as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
