I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
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