in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Randomize
